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  • Dan Yeager

Is Coffee Bad For You?

I've seen a lot of posts lately about how coffee is bad for you. I am, of course, in the coffee business, so the algorithm probably thinks that's the kind of thing I'm worried about so it shows me that stuff more than it does to the average person. But I really don't care. I am neither a scientist nor a doctor, so what I say about the matter shouldn't influence you in your life choices beyond what would a casual conversation with a friend, but this is what I've learned in my travels about "what's good and bad for us." Everything is bad for you in excess. Some things are good for you in moderation. Most things don't matter.

People drop dead from an excess of exercise. I remember a story about a woman who died trying to win a radio station's water drinking contest. She drank so much water that her body's electrolytes were diluted beyond functioning. I have a good friend who was airlifted to a hospital in another state from an excess of supplements and energy drinks.

I should also disclose that besides not being a scientist or a doctor, I am a drinker of whiskey and a cigar enthusiast, two things that are also supposedly shortening my life and risking my health. That may be true, but I find it unseemly for a man of faith to appear to be trying to live forever. (I'm not a man of faith.) Whiskey in moderation has tremendous antiseptic benefits. I'm convinced a daily shot or two prevents many infectious diseases. I think people who drink sugary stuff, alcoholic and non-alcoholic, are feeding dangerous bacteria in their mouths and guts. There are all sorts of bad things that come from that.

As for cigars, if it weren't for them, I probably would have dropped dead of a heart attack by now. Cigars make you chill. They seem to contain chemicals in them that are mildly stimulating, but also, the ritual is anti-hypertensive. You can't really do much while smoking a cigar (though I am smoking one as I write this). Cigarettes are a different story. Cigarettes are really bad for you because you inhale them and are full of chemicals to make them burn and to keep you wanting more. You're smoking paper, my friend. Why are you smoking paper? Cigars are all natural and organic. I'm convinced also that they're full of vitamins and minerals so each one is really like a serving of vegetables, which are definitely good for you.

Worse than any of these vices is your worrying about them. Worry is stress, and stress is going to kill you faster than anything. The best thing you can probably do for yourself is start meditating and do some yoga. Knowing this, I don't do either nearly enough, but to compensate, I don't worry about it. The past is gone and the future never arrives, and that which we call the present is so infinitesimally brief as to not be worth concerning ourselves with.

"Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thine often infirmities." 1 Timothy 5:23

Also, drink a cup of good coffee and laugh with a friend while doing so. We're all going to die eventually. You might as well enjoy it.